It's kind of funny to think about, but when I think of my offensive linemen I like to think of dancing ballerinas. Like if you would picture that, it would make you be in a happy place [bc it is hilarious] and then you can make an informed decision. Because nothing pisses me off more than missing on an offensive linemen for whatever the reason: likes too much eat less play, pure laziness, I eat too much and my knees, bending, back, any bullshit for the reason that these guys fail to do the damn job. The real reason is because your weight isn't distributed properly you lazy fuck and your knees can't support it, yet, if the whole body would have added strength properly distributed it would be possible to be without pain, as I've seen it before. Okay, thank you captain dietician. But if I think you can move around and dance, then you're not going to fail me in the 4th quarter because of some word called
FATIGUE. Likes what does that even mean. I need you to be nimble and on your feet and ready to go all damn day, because that is what a ballerina can do. At the end of the day, they are athletic and you need to have athletic linemen, especially with the specimens they have on the defensive side of the ball these days. The ballerinas help me remember that.
Joel Bitonio
Nevada
Height: 193.6 cm
Weight: 21.5 stone
Mini Chalk: This guy probably in the mold of a guard than a tackle because he is like a walking penguin out there flailing his arms. I'm not anti-lumberjack or anything, as long as you can get through the ballerina routine than I don't care what you look like but this guy offers minimal flexibility, although playing at the tackle position his entire career. On the inside, his numbers are right in line with the guards of the NFL today. This guy has a mean streak, like nasty. Like he would kick my ass, and I'm about 14.5 stone, if he read what I said about him.
Player comp:
run-of-the-mill Big Ten Guard
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